Here are web sites and books that have been helpful to me. However, there are many more books and sites available than I have listed here. To find your state's abuse web site, go to Google.com, or Yahoo.com and type in your state and domestic violence and press enter. For example, if you live in Idaho, type Idaho domestic violence, and you'll get a list of sites to click on. Some of those sites will give you the phone number for a shelter near you. On the Idaho site, the 5th listing gives names and numbers of Idaho shelters.
http://www.unchainedhearts.com/ A book called "The Man of her Dreams the Woman of His" said to save marriages. Includes statement about marriage being taught "upside down". The page for men is especially informative.
www.WomanSubmit.com By Jocelyn Andersen. Women Submit! Christians and Domestic Violence is a book that uses Jocelyn's experiences with abuse as a starting point to show how domestic violence looks in the lives of real Christians, and how friends and clergy respond--often blaming the abused woman. The book is available on her web site.
Would the Real Church PLEASE Stand Up! by Susan Greenfield. (Amazon page) Susan documents her experiences indealing with an abusive pastor/husband, and how their church supported him and blamed her. Her story includes the difficulties she faced in escaping with two small children, going to a shelter and in setting up housing with a lack of funds.
Divorce and Remarriage in the Church By David Instone-Brewer This is both a website and represents 2 books: "Divorce and Remarriage in the Church: Biblical Solutions for Pastorial Realites" & "Divorce and Remarriage in the Bible:The Social and Literary Context"